I had eluded in my very first post that my computer skills are quite rusty, and this is true! I was, however, quite the "geek" back in the days of DOS and Windows 3.1 and even ran my own BBS for a while. For those of you youngsters who haven't heard the term "BBS" (or Bulletin Board System) I suggest you Google it, although I'm sure your thoughts after learning what it is will simply be, "Oh how 80's of you!" I was a latecomer to the wonderful and wide world of the Internet not wanting to give up my dial-up for DSL. And then some time after the release of Windows 2000, and thousands of requests from friends and family members asking me to "help" fix their computers, I gave up. I no longer had the patience for it and decided I was only going to continue with the basic essentials, like logging onto Facebook or setting up a free email account.
When I decided to start this blog I was pretty lost, but thanks to Google and the mass amounts of information at your fingertips, I have been researching and learning as I go. One thing I am finding very interesting is the "Google Webmaster Tools". I am still at the beginning stages of understanding how all these tools work, but it's been fun for me to watch as things change and are added in regards to my little website.
Today I noticed that my "search queries" tool now shows a total of 4 searches where my blog has shown up on Google (albeit on page 460, but still). Although 3 of the search queries made instant sense to me, one of them didn't which was "How to Paint a Raccoon".
Yes, I remember typing the word "raccoon" in one of my posts but that's not what didn't make sense. I saw this search query and said to myself, "WTF? Why would someone want to paint a raccoon? Isn't that animal cruelty?" Luckily, my second thought came quick behind which was, "Oh yeah, it's probably an artist wanting to know how to paint a painting of a raccoon!" That's better! I then began wondering why in the world would my first thought be so crazy, and it dawned on me. "Ah yes, my family! My crazy and sometimes mind-numbing family! That's why!" Let me explain.
I have four nieces, a nephew, and a daughter who are now well into their 20's, the oldest just hitting 30. As children a few of them were very inquisitive and were always asking questions that at times might seem silly, but they were children and their imaginations were at their peak. I gladly answered all of their questions to the best of my ability but as they grew older, into teenagers, their questions continued and answers to the questions prompted more questions until the questions became so silly and yes, mind-numbing, that you just wanted to crawl into a hole where they couldn't find you for a very long time. For example, if one of them would ask, 'Why is the colour black, black?" and you would explain that black is the absence of light they would then ask questions like, "Then why is the night sky black when the moon is lighting it?" or, "Then why if you shine a flashlight onto something black that it doesn't change colour?" or "But is black really black or just a really dark purple?". Any answer I gave would be questioned and it became apparent to me that it really didn't matter how I answered. They were just going to go on and, on and, on until my head exploded.
There is one particular day that I unfortunately remember vividly. I was driving with my oldest niece over the Burlington Skyway Bridge and she asked, "So, if one of the hydro poles over there fell into the lake would it electrocute people who are swimming on the beach in Toronto?" To understand how very aggravating this question was at the time there are a couple of things you need to know. 1) I have a phobia of driving on bridges over water. I don't know why or where it came from but I have it. 2) The Burlington Skyway Bridge travels across Lake Ontario near Hamilton which is about 70km away from Toronto. I thought about answering a simple "No" to her, but then realized that water conducts electricity and well, the next question was coming. In my phobic state all I could scream was, "I don't (enter expletive here) know! I'm not the (enter expletive here) Dalia Lama!" My niece didn't miss a beat. She began to explain her theory, in great detail, of why she believed they would be electrocuted. I did say mind-numbing, right?
So it's only natural now that when I see a question like, "How To Paint a Raccoon?" my mind turns to an absurd and crazy possibility rather than a logical one. It does seem like my family has programmed me to think crazy. Crazy is my normal. And as I write this there is something else that I have come to realize and that is, I would not change it for anything . Crazy is fun and thought provoking. Crazy is interesting. Crazy is unique. Yes, I really do think I like this type of crazy!
Oh, and I did manage to Google, "How to Paint a Raccoon". There was nothing crazy about it at all.
When I decided to start this blog I was pretty lost, but thanks to Google and the mass amounts of information at your fingertips, I have been researching and learning as I go. One thing I am finding very interesting is the "Google Webmaster Tools". I am still at the beginning stages of understanding how all these tools work, but it's been fun for me to watch as things change and are added in regards to my little website.
Today I noticed that my "search queries" tool now shows a total of 4 searches where my blog has shown up on Google (albeit on page 460, but still). Although 3 of the search queries made instant sense to me, one of them didn't which was "How to Paint a Raccoon".
Yes, I remember typing the word "raccoon" in one of my posts but that's not what didn't make sense. I saw this search query and said to myself, "WTF? Why would someone want to paint a raccoon? Isn't that animal cruelty?" Luckily, my second thought came quick behind which was, "Oh yeah, it's probably an artist wanting to know how to paint a painting of a raccoon!" That's better! I then began wondering why in the world would my first thought be so crazy, and it dawned on me. "Ah yes, my family! My crazy and sometimes mind-numbing family! That's why!" Let me explain.
I have four nieces, a nephew, and a daughter who are now well into their 20's, the oldest just hitting 30. As children a few of them were very inquisitive and were always asking questions that at times might seem silly, but they were children and their imaginations were at their peak. I gladly answered all of their questions to the best of my ability but as they grew older, into teenagers, their questions continued and answers to the questions prompted more questions until the questions became so silly and yes, mind-numbing, that you just wanted to crawl into a hole where they couldn't find you for a very long time. For example, if one of them would ask, 'Why is the colour black, black?" and you would explain that black is the absence of light they would then ask questions like, "Then why is the night sky black when the moon is lighting it?" or, "Then why if you shine a flashlight onto something black that it doesn't change colour?" or "But is black really black or just a really dark purple?". Any answer I gave would be questioned and it became apparent to me that it really didn't matter how I answered. They were just going to go on and, on and, on until my head exploded.
There is one particular day that I unfortunately remember vividly. I was driving with my oldest niece over the Burlington Skyway Bridge and she asked, "So, if one of the hydro poles over there fell into the lake would it electrocute people who are swimming on the beach in Toronto?" To understand how very aggravating this question was at the time there are a couple of things you need to know. 1) I have a phobia of driving on bridges over water. I don't know why or where it came from but I have it. 2) The Burlington Skyway Bridge travels across Lake Ontario near Hamilton which is about 70km away from Toronto. I thought about answering a simple "No" to her, but then realized that water conducts electricity and well, the next question was coming. In my phobic state all I could scream was, "I don't (enter expletive here) know! I'm not the (enter expletive here) Dalia Lama!" My niece didn't miss a beat. She began to explain her theory, in great detail, of why she believed they would be electrocuted. I did say mind-numbing, right?
So it's only natural now that when I see a question like, "How To Paint a Raccoon?" my mind turns to an absurd and crazy possibility rather than a logical one. It does seem like my family has programmed me to think crazy. Crazy is my normal. And as I write this there is something else that I have come to realize and that is, I would not change it for anything . Crazy is fun and thought provoking. Crazy is interesting. Crazy is unique. Yes, I really do think I like this type of crazy!
Oh, and I did manage to Google, "How to Paint a Raccoon". There was nothing crazy about it at all.